In the S**T

The week has been one of weather watching and waiting for some rain, which thankfully came so that I don’t have to spend each evening watering wilting plants, picking what produce is available and weeding. It has also been routine as far as the animals are concerned, feeding, watering cleaning out, making sure they are as happy as possible so that the hens lay eggs, which they are in abundance, and that everything else is enjoying life as it should be. We have taken in a drake, which was left behind at a local establishment after a function, he settled in very quickly with the older ducks so I guess he is staying. The pesky fox is still around every night but our birds are locked away securely so it is only the disturbance of the dog barking at it that is a pain, however it did strike next door and I think it won’t be long before it strikes in the day here so we are always on guard and the dog has got very good at going looking at the certain times of day and evening.

Now to the headline event! The muck heaps have become a bit of an issue building up to huge piles that need tidying and sorting out, we have three on the go at various places around the farm. The main one at the back has collapsed and as yet has not been tackled, the one to the side has begun to spread much further than it ought to and was the one we tackled first. Our youngest daughter got the tractor out and as mentioned before is pretty good at manoeuvring it, Hubby was busy tiling the kitchen and so we left her to get on with it. Job done in that area it was time to move on to the front pile, this is the oldest and it was decided to remove the boards and push it through to the orchard where the chickens will hopefully scatter it about eventually, she spent a happy afternoon moving most of the muck successfully with no problems at all. At the end of the day there was still a bit left to move but as we were nearly out of diesel we decided it would wait until the next day.
Cue Hubby’s turn to use the tractor in the muck heap! Bear in mind that doing this job the day before had been without incident and you will understand why I decided to include this in the blog.
A beautiful sunny Sunday morning, one of those mornings when it is a delight to get outside and do a bit of work, Hubby goes off to get some fuel and on his return fills up the tractor and sets to work moving the remaining muck so that it is cleared ready to start again. After only one hour, yes one hour, he has got the tractor firmly stuck, there is no traction on the tyres as they are covered in wet muck, the tractor is slipping and sliding to the side every time he tries to reverse it out of the hole he has now created. I very helpfully try to shovel some of it out of the way to see if that helps, it doesn’t, but he keeps trying to reverse anyway causing the ruts to get deeper and deeper. GO ROUND THE SIDE he shouts AND PUSH THE TRACTOR SIDEWAYS AS I TRY TO REVERSE IT, Oh that is sure as hell is going to work isn’t it, me in my half century year trying to push half a ton of tractor in a direction it doesn’t want to go but as the dutiful wife I am, I give it a go, if only to prove him wrong, which of course it does and I almost get a hernia. We turn the tractor off and have a coffee and decide what’s to be done next, if you move what’s in front of you, I suggest, you can go forwards into the orchard and turn around, I will try digging it out he says completely ignoring my comment, ok get on with it then I think to myself. After about an hour of him digging and trying to reverse he has not got very far and is in the shit proper, our youngest daughter has left by this time to go to a festival but our eldest daughter arrives, why don’t you get the rope and use the van to pull it out she says. I would have thought he would jump at this suggestion but no he thinks his digging will work better, while we go off to have croissants, he continues by various means to try and reverse the tractor out, failing miserably. We enjoy our breakfast and discuss his reluctance to do anything other than frantically try and dig the tractor out and keep trying to move the tractor but slipping and sliding and getting nowhere, it s been like this for thirty years I explain to my daughter, he doesn’t listen, the only person he makes it hard for is himself and I usually give up the ghost and go to find something more productive to do.
Croissants and coffee finished, I excuse myself and go to the toilet, this may seem irrelevant but when you think about how long it takes to pee you will see why I included it, by the time I come back outside I can see eldest daughter triumphantly holding the rope in her hands, a big smile on her face and the tractor is freed ready to carry on the days work. In my estimation it took less than two minutes, why, why, why would you spend over an hour trying unsatisfactory methods of extraction when it could have been as painless as that!!! MEN, when will they learn that we ARE always right 😉
I can report that the rest of the clearance went without incident and Hubby’s only remark was ‘alright alright’ you bet we are, I muttered under my breath.

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